Childhood in Light of Halloween

Halloween happens to be in my top 3 favorite holidays. On days like today, when the routine of life and the fluorescent lights of the library are determined to crush my spirit, I claim it as my very favorite (yes, above all the big ones: Christmas, Easter, the 4th of July, Arbor Day). To an extent, I may have inherited my enthusiasm for the creepiest of holidays from my younger sister, Victoria, who has gone all out for Halloween for as long as I can remember. It was only a matter of time, though, before my love of Edgar Allan Poe, Alfred Hitchcock, and Snickers caught up with me, too...yes, I love Halloween.

To celebrate this year, I dressed up as the mouse from If You Give a Mouse a Cookie, one of my favorite books from when I was a kid. I made my own ears, rocked a pair of overalls, drew on whiskers and a little nose, and stuck a cookie (made of paper) in my pocket. And true to character, all day long, I craved a glass of milk to go with my cookie. I went to class, work, my internship at Darkness to Light, and my ESL class dressed as a mouse...I had no shame. It was Halloween! I am proud to say I elicited several smiles as people saw me walking down the street and when I entered a room.

The grand finale of my day caught me off guard. I thought the festivities were long over, and I was ready to wipe the drawn-on eyeliner off my nose. I was in a deserted frozen yogurt shop where my roommate, Courtney, works, waiting patiently for her to finish closing. Unexpectedly, she turned the music up, and recognition rolled over me: "Shout" by Tears for Fears. It was a beckoning back to our "American Duos: Shawn as Curt Smith and Gus as Michael Jackson" costume from last year. We danced in the classic Shawn and Gus fashion. No idea what I'm talking about? Here's a video to catch you up:

Anyway, one of the main reasons I love Halloween is that it is a celebration of childhood. For adults, it is the only day in the year where it is acceptable to "play dress up" and eat absurd amounts of candy. For me, as a child, I definitely exercised these freedoms more than just on Halloween. Halloween was the pinnacle of piecing together fun costumes and sitting on the floor surrounding myself with discarded candy wrappers until my stomach was swollen with sugary bliss. Remember trading pieces of candy with your friends? Remember the disappointment of getting a box of raisins or peppermint? Remember cold Halloweens where you just ended up wearing a coat over your costume as you trick-or-treated? Remember suspending disbelief and being genuinely terrified by every elongated shadow, yet finding nothing but joy in the terror?

I'm thinking a lot about childhood these days and what it means to reclaim it. With my work at Darkness to Light, I've learned a lot about child sexual abuse and the damage it does not only to a person's childhood but also to their future. There's something really freeing about looking back at the happy moments of your childhood, reflecting on the innocence and the intensity coloring every experience. I want to be more childlike in my everyday...not in the sense that I am immature and irresponsible, but that I really dig my toes into the dirt without worrying about getting dirty. I am currently planning an event for the spring centered around reclaiming childhood through the lens of child abuse as part of the Bonner Leader Program's Engage and Empower week.

So do me a favor and start thinking about your childhood. What are your favorite memories? What did you like to do most of all? What did you dream of becoming when you grew up? Who were your best friends? What was your favorite food? What music did you dance around to? What were your most painful moments? How did they shape you?
Tell me...what do you want to reclaim about your childhood?